|You Are Likely a First Born|
last night I had a revolting nights sleep. went down late couldn't relax and so felt awful this morning. So I decided there and then to start my new sleeping routine. i changed times around to better suit the family and so that kyle didn't think I was having an affair (yeah right like I have time for that.)
So I took a few naps today and found it surprisingly easy to drop off (lack of sleep will do that to you though)
When I awoke I felt pretty good actually. That was a surprise in itself. I was expecting to be groggy or come out of it hard. I didn't.
But then again we will see how feel in a few days. So welcome to Thusrnight.
When reading about doing this it advises not to do anything to technical at first or anything that requires the brain to function at any high level.
So I thought I should most probably keep moving for the most part. Let me tell you the lounge is tidier then it has been in a long while. Dusted everything put away properly or waiting to go into rooms where sleeping bodies are.
Tomorrow, tomorrow i will attack the craft room, that will take more then one night though i would think.
I borrowed some easy reading books so even when I am tiring I can relax a little and read.
Once I get over the icky stage which can take a few weeks I plan to use my nights for writing and bearing (crittering really). I can spend the days doing things with the girls and the the house chores that need to be done but the nights the nights will be mine. I will not have the tv going. i refuse to get sucked into watching tv. I will use my ipod to play music so that noone is disturbed. And i will create my world.
in the meantime i will do quiet things and keep the door to or room closed so as not to disturb his highness. I generally wn't be using this extra time to spend more time surfing the net either. the net is my biggest downfall and the Alphasmart is going to come in really handy to keep me on the straight and narrow. once i can figure out how to use it properly.
I have no doubt some of the things i do i will look back on and go what the hell was I thinking but hey that is life and we need to explore things for ourselves. So Friday morning is looking busy I will be tidying the two youngest girls rooms in an effort to keep myself going and i can't do them at night.
Lets have a party albeit a quiet one, celebrating my most recent step into eccentricity
In the past few months I have been bombarded with people I know and care about facing the same threat. the big C.
That is right the big scary cancer.
I had my third person tell me they are going in.
The first was my Dad. Due to a whole heap of bizarre reasons he can't have treatment. really really strange reasons. I have a pretty good feeling though. I have no sorrow or grief and due to the bizarre reasons he can't have treatment I know they will lead to him healing himself.
Then my friends mum. Went in for a routine checkup and a week later had a total hysterectomy. She will be fine as well.
Last Thursday another friend found a lump in her throat, she is in for her thyroid to be removed today. Where the other 2 are optimistic she worries me the most. She is so sure she is going to die from this. That it is the worst case scenario. the drs have told her that it isn't the worst type she could have, but she has decided it has spread through her body.
She has to be positive, she calls it realism. I tell her noi t isn't it is a defeatist attitude. If I believed everything the drs had told me i would not have my darling number 4 daughter. I was told she shouldn't be brought to term. I was told her limbs would be deformed and she would have no chance of survial as her lungs wwouldn't be developed. i as told she would be blind,deaf an brain damaged.
Well right now her and her sister are playing noisily as She rides her older sisters back yelling yeehah!
You can feel scared I often did but you should decide fine I have been told I have cancer. They will remove it and I will be fine. I will l have caught it in time and I will be ok.
please send your prayers and healing thoughts to these people. They need all the positives they can get.